can't be fussed about anything

Very stoic song I reckon...

Guess...it's hard but haha like wat dodgy says...I need to harden myself and be strong........WHEEEEEEEEEEEE...

Sometimes I feel like I'm a bird with broken wings
At times I dread my now and envy where I've been
'Cause that's when quiet wisdom takes control
At least I've got a story no one's told

[Chorus]
I finally learned to say
Whatever will be will be
I learned to take
The good, the bad and breathe
'Cause although we like
To know what life's got planned
No one knows if shooting stars will land

These days it feels naive to put your faith in hope
To imitate a child, fall backwards on the snow
'Cause that's when fears will usually lead you blind
And now I try to under-analyse

[Chorus]

Is the rope I walk wearing thin?
Is the life I love caving in?
Is the weight on your mind
A heavy black bird caged inside?

Say
Whatever will be will be
Take
The good, the bad
Just breathe

'Cause although we like
To know what life's got planned
No one knows if shooting stars will land

I finally learned to say
Whatever will be will be
I learned to take
The good, the bad and breathe
'Cause although we like
To know what life's got planned
Thing like that are never in your hands
No one knows if shooting stars will land

renzi kissed and swore @ 5:32:00 PM
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thanks guys

I can never stress enough I love you guys...for even offering to come to my place....

jingxi...karen...jon....rongyang....

I love you guys..sigh

renzi kissed and swore @ 12:37:00 AM
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Family ties

Had the chance to sit down and read For One More Day by Mitch Albom. It's another one of Albom's heartwarming works and I'm once again impressed that he could trigger my tear ducts. I did however prefer his other book, Tuesdays with Maurie but i didn't manage to finish that book. Bleah. Anyway here are some quotes I thought was quite good...

It's such a shame to waste time. We always think we have so much of it.

Sticking with your family is what makes it a fanily

Secrets will tear you apart

Perdonare – forgive yourself

You need to keep people close. You need to give them access to your heart

If you can, go read this book!

renzi kissed and swore @ 5:40:00 PM
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Rest in peace....

Tears, Idle Tears
Alfred, Lord Tennyson (1809–1892)

Tears, idle tears, I know not what they mean,
Tears from the depth of some divine despair
Rise in the heart, and gather to the eyes,
In looking on the happy Autumn-fields,
And thinking of the days that are no more.

Fresh as the first beam glittering on a sail,
That brings our friends up from the underworld,
Sad as the last which reddens over one
That sinks with all we love below the verge;
So sad, so fresh, the days that are no more.

Ah, sad and strange as in dark summer dawns
The earliest pipe of half-awakened birds
To dying ears, when unto dying eyes
The casement slowly grows a glimmering square;
So sad, so strange, the days that are no more.

Dear as remembered kisses after death,
And sweet as those by hopeless fancy feigned
On lips that are for others; deep as love,
Deep as first love, and wild with all regret;
O Death in Life, the days that are no more!

I miss you mama, guess even after like close to 3 years, I still think of her from time to time. Hmmm...yeah I know my recent entries have been pretty depressing but I'm hanging in there. I'm prayin for the best...

renzi kissed and swore @ 1:58:00 PM
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You left me

You Left Me
by Emily Dickinson

You left me, sweet, two legacies, -
A legacy of love
A Heavenly Father would content,
Had He the offer of;

You left me boundaries of pain
Capacious as the sea,
Between eternity and time,
Your consciousness and me.

renzi kissed and swore @ 3:32:00 PM
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I can so attest to that.

Young people in developed countries are more unhappy.

How true is that!

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.
Helen Keller

What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life.
Leo Buscaglia

People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within.
Ramona L. Anderson:

renzi kissed and swore @ 4:39:00 PM
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thanks thanks thanks...wld have died a LOOONG time ago, if not for you guys

thanks guys....mr dodgy and kee...karen, bryan..etc etc for tryin to make me happier.....hahaha esp...dodgy ... your claim that you tattoo-ed "renzi" on your butt really cracked (hur hur no pun intended) me up!

Where do all the lonely *people* go?
Friends they thought they knew dont want to know.
Try to find a place to hide,
as they fall into there knees
Someone catch them, please.

* Everybody hurts, everybody aches.
Everybody falls, everybody breaks.
Just breathe, let it out, and breathe.

** Everybody cuts, everybody bleeds.
Every hidden scar is justified, so.
Breathe, let it out, and breathe.

Just breathe.

Cant you feel the circus in your head?
Dont you know your easily mislead?
So stand up if you give a damn, *its* slowly killing you.
And dont you feel it too.

renzi kissed and swore @ 2:37:00 PM
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hahahaha

JS is so funny! She messaged me at work and said..."Chewing bubblegum for ten to fifteen minutes burns eleven calories, the same amount you’d burn by walking up a small flight of stairs four times..... no wonder singaporeans are getting fatter cos bubble gum is banned!"

renzi kissed and swore @ 5:38:00 PM
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where is the love?

Miranda: When did all the men get together and decide that they were only going to get it up for giraffes with big breasts?

Carrie: Meanwhile, uptown, Charlotte wondered when relationships had gotten so complicated. She yearned for the time when dinner was followed by dessert, not lubricant.

Samantha: Money is power. Sex is power. Therefore, getting money for sex is simply an exchange of power.

Random woman: Monogamy is fabulous. It gives you a deep and profound connection with another human being, and you don't have to shave your legs as much.

Miranda: Orgasm? A major thing in a relationship?
Charlotte: Yeah, but not the only thing. I mean, orgasms don't send you Valentine's day cards and they don't hold your hand in a sad movie.

Carrie: By now she knew that "we" William wasn't ever going to show up. He was one of those men who faked a future to get what he wanted in the present.

Samantha: Men cheat for the same reason dogs lick their balls: because they can.

Carrie: Well, I think maybe there's a cheating curve. That someone's definition of what constitutes cheating is in direct proportion to how much they themselves want to cheat.
Miranda: That's moral relativism!
Carrie: I prefer to think of it as quantum cheating.

Samantha: If checking out other women is the biggest problem you're having with him, you're lucky.
Carrie: Well, if it's that small, then he should be able to stop.
Samantha: Oh please, you can't change that about a man. It's part of their genetic code. Like farting.

Random guy: Every girlfriend I've had wants me to change something. Change your job, change your friends, change your attitude... The only thing I change is girlfriends.

Samantha: Men do this all the time. Women walk around thinking "we," and their version of "we" is "me"... and my dick!

Duncan: I'm just one of those weird male aberrations who prefers to be married. I like stability, I like routine. I like knowing there's people waiting for me at home. I guess that makes me sound pretty dull.
Miranda: Are you kidding? You're the heterosexual holy grail.

Charlotte: It's a really cute three bedroom cottage and they're giving us a fantastic deal for the month of August.
Carrie: Yeah, of course it's a good deal. It's haunted with cheating boyfriends and sexual rejection.

Samantha: I've never been able to be friends with any man. Why would I? Women are for friendships, men are for fucking.

Charlotte: I've been dating since I was fifteen! I'm exhausted! Where is he?
Miranda: Who, the White Knight?
Samantha: That only happens in fairy tales.
Charlotte: My hair hurts.

Samantha: From my experience, honey, if he seems too good to be true—he probably is.

renzi kissed and swore @ 2:51:00 PM
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Sensitivity at work

I was out with silly Jon, having dinner at Sakae Sushi (along Citilink). We were about to pay when I encountered this...

Attendant: Er, that would be $XX. Do you have a UOB or HSBC card? It gives you a 10% discount.
Renzi: (tryin my luck as well as attempting to be cheeky) heh...ermmm...*enticing tone* how about......Citibank?
A: (stifles laugh, almoust chuckles to herself) ermm....mam..it's (spells out) H-S-B-C...

How embarrassing is that?? OF COURSE I FUCKIN HEARD YOU WOMAN..... I was just merely tryin my luck. You don't have to stifle the laugh and mock me...like I'm dumb and I don't know what HSBC is....grrrrrr...HSBC and Citibank sound so damn different. *mumble grumble*

HISSSSSSS!!! Beware of the angry pussy! I have a right to my anger, and I don't want anybody telling me I shouldn't be, that it's not nice to be, and that something's wrong with me because I get angry. (Maxine Waters, in Brian Lanker, I Dream a World, 1989)

renzi kissed and swore @ 10:46:00 PM
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Confucious says what???

Watched STEP UP with Mr Lim today and while paying for my corn, I cracked up a couple of comments, much to Zac's dismay but it definitely did made me CORN-tended HAHAHAHAA.

Z: (while buying steamed corn) You're not sick of corn?
R: It's different, one's popcorn, the other's steamed corn. Don't corn-fuse me!
Z: Man that's corny...
R: Hahaha..is it CORN-tagious for u?
Z: ...

I can't remember much of the conversation... but heheh...I think I'm quite funny! hahahahah

*sigh* okok...according to our dear confucious, or CORN-fucious (hur hur), he said "He who speaks without modesty will find it difficult to make his words good." okok...shall try to be more humble hahahaha

renzi kissed and swore @ 11:30:00 AM
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thanks humpa

in reference to my stupid 4-letter-word me nick:
Culinary Musician says:
Drop your pain down, live life anew, hurt will pass, cold will fade away, love will come, feel once more, eyes shut, hope glow.

thks so damn much *hugz* i love ya, bryan!

oh and of course Mr Dodge - "the easiest way to lose something is to want it too badly"

and thnks so much guys...u noe who u are...so slapping me, for making me understand the situation alittle more...susu, karen, jon, bryan, dodgy love u heaps! sigh...

renzi kissed and swore @ 2:04:00 PM
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thanks for the suggestion guys

call, meet, hang, poke, love, take, feel, kiss, lick, blow, fuck, slap, beat, kick, push, hate, miss, bore, kill

four-letter-word me, someone pls....

renzi kissed and swore @ 1:29:00 PM
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Yay!!! she's back!!!! whee!!! And I feel you gal! I'm with ya!!!

"The one thing that I realise now that I didn't before is that men have absolutely no regard for emotions and feelings. In fact, men are just motherfucking bastards who shit talk and mean nothing of what they say. And I'm really sorry to offend the male species and half of the world's population but all this is true and if you happen to own a penis yet disagree with me, you're probably just another coward.

The whole thing about men is that they say what they say because they want something, not because they mean something. Men are highly evolved children to whom the whole world is a gigantic toy department store. Saying the right things will mean a free Mazda Sports. Or a free PDA phone. Or a nice, big, bouncy set of tits."

I love dirtydancingdiva!

renzi kissed and swore @ 11:40:00 AM
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Shopping is goooooood

(sing it in the falalala xmas tune)

i jus did some heavy shopping...falalalala-lalalala
shopping took away my savings...falalalala-lalalala
damn the sale signs, argh! temptation... falalalala-lalalala
I'M a sucker for sale items falalalala-lalalala

renzi kissed and swore @ 8:43:00 AM
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news flesh 2

wtf? A 5-year-old faces explusion because he brought a knife to school. SERIOUSLY, I bet he's a little too young to think of doing anything other than open his sealed lunch. Paranoia...tsk

huhhh.... mobile phones that track your buddies? NO WAYYYYYYyyy... i don't want that...I mean even though in the age, we're given the power to have such a luzury, I won't want a phone that allows some sort or ANY sort of tracking devive. We need our privacy!!!

time to hit the gym regularly because studies have shown that, well if you keep fit and trim, you'll live longer. Then again, I don't wanna live that long. Maybe till 35 years old?

Hmmmm, annnnddd... MAYBE I should start eating less red meat.

This is not news hehe but a really funny clip of the slugs from flushed away. You should catch it, really damn funny! hahahaha....

AND FOR ALL GUYS (in light of Youtube, andddd since all guys watch bloody porn), there is this porn site called YOUPORN...hahha go check it out.

renzi kissed and swore @ 11:28:00 AM
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LONG OVERDUE

Well, I knw this is long overdue but I was talkin or arguing about politics. Someone kept telling me that he/she wanted to not participate - ie stick out of the shit/politics but I found a quote that nicely sums it up...

"There is no such thing as being non-political. Just by making a decision to stay out of politics you are making the decision to allow others to shape politics and exert power over you. And if you are alienated from the current political system, then just by staying out of it you do nothing to change it, you simply entrench it."

Joan Kirner at Women Into Power Conference, Adelaide, October 1994

AHA! AHAAAA!!!!

renzi kissed and swore @ 9:04:00 AM
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So they say

You scored as Defier/rebel. Your procrastination type is the defier, also known as the rebel. Defiers like to break the rules and rebel against chores and other assignments given to them. They take offense when given tasks by other people and are insulted by suggestions to change their habits.
Rebelling is a normal thing that teens do to test how much power they have over their lives, but it can go past the common testing of rules and limits when some people "get stuck in the mode of rebelling."

Defier/rebel

88%

Worrier

75%

Perfectionist

75%

Dreamer

56%

Teenager

56%

Overdoer

44%

Not a procrastinator

44%

ADD

38%

Crisis-maker

38%

What type of procrastinator are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

renzi kissed and swore @ 1:46:00 PM
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food, glorious food - ALL IN MELBOURNE!!! *WaiL*

Laurent cakes....i miss them Laurent cakes...sigh....This reminds me of Humpa!!! hello humpa!!!

Burgerssss..yumm...

I also miss huge decadent portions of pasta and pizzas

Hahah this reminds me of humpa too......Vegetarian food...something I'll never touch in Singapore

more cakes! pastry..

breakfasts!

TARTS!

Of course we cannot discount the fact that they have excellent egg chiffon rice!!!

OOkayyy lah...wine also lah..

ribs...ulgh..i'm getting hungryyyyy

steak...!!

YUM CHAA!!! hur hur......

River Kwai's thai fooooood

Did i mention drinks?

renzi kissed and swore @ 10:20:00 AM
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mORBID with a capital M

hahaha this is funny...how to commit suicide....some are funny, some are just downright DISGUSTING. Enjoy!

renzi kissed and swore @ 2:18:00 PM
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knn!

stupid keith....can u be nicer to meeee...he wrote this in his blog hahaa..quite amusing lah. BUT in my defense I must say..............the difference between saying fuck and sex on the streets is MORE people would turn when they hear the word fuck? Comprehendo? Anyway here's wat he said....

renee aka R :: hey why is FUCK considered vulgar?
R :: isn't sex the same as FUCK, but why dun people curse you with "SEX"
Keith aka K :: it doesn't RHYME, does it ?
R :: But but ok but why ?
K :: DO you say "SEX off you SEXER" ??
R :: but ok ... why fuck ? why ?
R :: if i stand there (*pointing to the stairs leading to centerpoint*) and say FUCK ! I am sure everyone will look at me but if i say "SEX" *PAUSES*
Keith and SUSU :: *Stares at RENEE blankly*
SUSU :: PEOPLE WILL STILL STARE AT YOU !!
R :: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK !!
keith ::*plays the "RENEE is a dumb fuck jingle"*

You said something too u noe...*wink* but i shall keep it to myself... OKayyy let's see anyway..didn't do much during the weekend. Kinda clubbed, well Actually I didn't. Keith, Ken and I went to Devil's only to watch Mr Lai dance...zzz I ended up going home in the wee hours of the morning. Zzzzzz Then on Sunday, went to watch the Guardian (IT WAS SUPERB...almost bawled but felt abit uncomfortable and unglam crying in front of Zac) before meeting Susu for dinner at Parkway. Apart from this, well, it hasn't been eventful.

Guess I'm lookin forward to the weekend...wait....to the week first! hehehe

TOmorrow i'm meeting my dear Jon, thenn...Wednesday, I meeting Karen anddddd....fuck I can't remember who I'm meeting on thursday but....oh well, I'll soon find out...ulgh, hate it when I can't remember...fuck fuck fuck...

renzi kissed and swore @ 1:05:00 PM
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news flesh!

flesh? hahahahah...too lazy to change the typo... nevermind because u can always savour flesh news hahahahaahah okok....lame there...

1) Google accidentally sends out email worm. How retarded is that?? I mean, really...a proper organisation screwing up like that. No one appreciates people who screw up. And what's with cheezy names ....karma sutra worm? wtf??

2) For all those who love to diet, be careful because low carb, low fat diets pose similar heart disease risk.

3) It's not feasible to ban pesticides to curb suicides. If you want to ban SOME, the people who want to kill themselves can use the rest of the other pesticides that are not banned, right? Besides, come on, if you really wanna kill yourself, there are many other ways to do so. Tsk...DUMBBBBBB, really....DUMB...

4) Australia's said to be one of the better places to live in. What do u reckon?

5) This is quite amusing, especially the phrasing of this whole matter about mixing up two kids and only finding out or realising that they have the wrong kids after 15 years.

renzi kissed and swore @ 4:54:00 PM
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constantly amused.

GO is always amusing me...well actually we amuse each other with our mispronounciations. I remember the guys back in melbourne telling me that they should start a renzism blog right? I suggest to suggest a renzi-cum-GO blog....! HAHAHAHA

Okayyyy...I'll spare GO the agony...I'll take the piss out of myself. Note to people who bother to read - whenever this happened I was extremely tired..hehe excuses...

1) Instead of saying "off my prices", I exclaimed to my client "off my PIE-SERS"

2) I pronounced "mouthful" as "mouth-MUL"

3) "Let's cwoss the road there!"

4) I said "SORT-age" instead of pronouncing it as shortage

5) Annnndd the last one - my favourite...I made a comment in the morning and there was this moment of silence. I had to probe because the awkward silence was deafening....And guess wat they heard??? My boobs are so big, it hurts.

The things ppl say....tsk... hehehe

renzi kissed and swore @ 3:58:00 PM
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exercise!!!

Well....as this article advocates, we all should exercise. Haven't been feeling too well last week so I shall rest till...say, Thursday....BODY COMBAT HERE I COME!!!

renzi kissed and swore @ 5:17:00 PM
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drawing personalities!!!

hahahahha cool!!

this is my pig from the drawapig website and it said that...
Toward the middle, they are a realist.
Facing front, they are direct, enjoy playing devil's advocate and neither fear nor avoid discussions.
With few details, they are emotional and naive, they care little for details and are a risk-taker.
With 4 legs showing, they are secure, stubborn, and stick to their ideals.
The bigger the better. They drew small ears, they are an OK listener
The length of the tail indicates the quality of their sex life.And again more is better! They drew medium sized tail

Andddd..I drew a house too for this website...I linked mine to the soongsista's lane, sooooo.....if u do decide to draw a house to check out your personality, feel free to be linked to our lane! hehehe

renzi kissed and swore @ 11:59:00 AM
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Mr Loy's a himbotic gay

hahahhahaa didn't do much except shop with Karen, catch two movies and watch two silly men drink. I caught Tiger and Snow and Flushed Away with Calvin and Zac respectively. My highlight was well, watching Mr Lai and Mr Loy drink on Saturday (I couldn't drink because I felt abit sick). I made this SUPER lame joke which resulted in Keith speaking up -

Keith: I also know how to say a few french words!!!
Renee: Oh?
K: YA! Like......... *pause* CARBONARA!
R: Hmmm
Lai: Errrmmm..isn't carbonara like, italian?
K: KNN!!!!!

Which leads me to conclude....
KEITH'S A HIMBO!!!!
KEITH'S A HIMBOTIC GAY!!!!!
KEITH'S A HIMBOTIC 'CHARMING' GAY!!!!

renzi kissed and swore @ 11:35:00 PM
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the only thing that made my day

check this out...hahahaha...i kinda miss feeding my hamster at home.

renzi kissed and swore @ 4:55:00 PM
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Written just now at about 1pm (after lunch)

"Life isn't about the pursuit of happiness, it's about being happy in your pursuits." - Got this quote from somewhere...i can't remember... but i guess it's quite good. Shall not dwell in that, nor discuss it because I'm not really in the mood to do so.

My horoscope for yesterday...
A fog of drama has settled on your life today, and whether or not your actions are the cause is irrelevant. AND Prepare to feel some grief today, Renee, as you mourn the loss of a close friend. No, she has not died, but she's moved away or moved on in some way.

Right now, for today at least, I'm just suffering from the after-effects of the lack of sleep. I hate it. But I must highlight and mention this extremely important point - Karen is a Godsend. Whatever you call it, fate or God's will, in my opinion, God really gave me Karen, really. I mean she's always here at the right time, I swear. Once I was feeling crappy about something (can't remember what though) and I was on my way to meet a friend in a bus, and I was just thinking of her and *POOF* she boarded the bus! Yesterday, I was feeling like shit in the wee hours of the morning (approximately 1.30am) and she of all people called me there and then! I mean who in the world would call you that early in the morning and how can it be so coincidental?

Dearest bestie..thanks for being there and prodding me back to reality. I love you so damn much and I can't wait to see you on Saturday to give you a bloody tight hug!

renzi kissed and swore @ 3:22:00 PM
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